WHAT IS YOUR DRIVING FORCE?

“This above all: to thine own self be true.” - Williams Shakespeare

Every other Being is taken. You are all you have got. As you may already know, this series was inspired by the number of feedbacks I got from the anonymous messaging site. Many expressed that they were bothered about me. Some also asked if I am now an atheist. I am not sure whether to appreciate them for looking out for me well enough to add worrying to it. What can I say? “There is nothing to be worried about.” That is cliché. I’d rather ask, what exactly are you bothered about?

A lady once sent a direct message to me on Instagram and asked if I was still in Christ. She further expressed her fear of going to hell fire after all is said and done. I politely thanked her for her concern and asked her in return, “Why are you scared?” She beat about the bush, unable to give a satisfactory answer. You see, that is not how I want to live my life. How can I say that I am a child of God and be scared of my father to the point that I think he would throw me in a burning fire. My biological father will not do that. How much God – the ever loving One.

Permit me, many of the sisters who refused to rub cream on their bodies or apply powder on their faces, on the premise that they would rather get to heaven and discover that they could have used all those things than go to hell wishing they didn’t, now wear attachments in a “christianly fashion”. What does that change? Is it that there is no more hell or it no longer matters? What changed for them? My answer – I don’t care. You do whatever makes you tick.

In life, we are in the same school, however we are not all in the same class, forget about age. That said, people will act based on the wealth of knowledge available to them per time. As I evolved, I stopped asking certain questions. I now accept the mystery of God’s existence although I am still curious to know how he came to be. My curiosity helps me to understand the person who doesn’t believe in the existence of God. Think about it, if you will let yourself do so. Where did God come from? I digress.

From one phase of my life to the next, my line of reasoning evolves and my focus keeps shifting albeit leading towards one of my life’s purposes in this lifetime – to be spiritually grounded. This has got nothing to do with religion – and that is mostly because religion boxes people but I think it is also because people do not ask questions because they are scared of what they will find.

Being a realist (with a touch of idealism), I constantly ask logical questions. For example, if God is Love and Love is not destructive, why would he create a fire to burn people up, and even so, because they did not believe that Jesus is Lord? Another instance: if it is unacceptable for Catholics to pray to God through a medium – Mary, and so-called idol worshippers are considered unbelievers for praying to God through their deities and effigies, how come praying to God through Jesus isn’t idol worshipping? Yet again, who made the Bible the sole book of authority to rule our daily lives?

You are in my space now and I can freely say this: Christianity is not the saving religion. Neither is Islam nor any of the other religions available. If you think otherwise, ask yourself, before the advent of Christianity, what religion were the people practising? How did they worship, serve or connect to God? Through prophets? Well, we are back to mediums again. It is what the presumed idol worshippers (better called ‘Diviners’) do too. These and more are the questions I ask and I do so to understand why people hold certain beliefs. More so, it is important to me that I am not a gullible follower, doing things because they said He said. What if He did not say so? That is what I seek to know. The bible said; Jesus said. What of what he did not say and they said he said? What of the ones he said but weren’t recorded? The bible, no doubt, is a great book. However, I (do not) beg to differ, it is not the word of God and therefore has no binding authority on me. Certainly, we can pick lessons and guidance from the philosophies it bears, that does not make it an authentic book.

I am a deist and whilst I believe in the sovereignty of God, I do not practise any form of religion. I am, instead, spiritual. I could choose a medium through which to access God but my belief about God runs deeper than that, in that I know that I can access God by myself because I am God(dess) myself.

Need I say that this new belief system has given me the fulfilment I had long been in search of? I know I have only scratched the surface and this journey is leading towards a bigger objective. In the meantime, I enjoy my time as a spiritualist and enthusiastically look forward to further and deeper evolutions.

If it helps, I’d explicitly implore you to quit bothering about my “sudden change”. As you now know, it was not sudden and I did not die by it. Instead, I am now alive because I am walking in the path I chose. No, you do not have to be like me. In fact, please don’t, considering that you are not called into it. What you can rather do is to find your own path and what gives you that beyond-the-surface connection which every soul seeks and desires to experience.

You will find your own light and it will lead you in your way. Always remember this: whenever you feel unsure or scared that you are going off, instead of concluding that you are in the wrong, ask questions and keep asking until you get genuine answers.

The Universe answers to you at all times.

Love,

Olori Tana